Be a Victor, Not a Victim

It's so easy to get into the mindset of being a victim. Easy to ask yourself why this or that happened to you? To feel like the sky is falling. To get so easily caught up in your own negative dialog. Feeling like a victim.

Feeling like a victor requires a perspective change. A victor sees challenges as opportunities. Opportunities to grow, learn, and expand. Overcome...be victorious!

However, when life feels like you are constantly on the receiving end of the "short end of the straw," it's hard to not feel like a victim.

So how might you move from feeling like a victim to a victor?
Here's some ideas:

1. Are you grateful? Check your pulse.
Find 3 things each day that you are grateful for. It can be as simple as your own pulse. Because having a pulse means you have been blessed being here. I'm sure there are others out there that would love to have a pulse...for one more day...but they don't.

2. Go out and do something nice for someone else.
Doing for others helps plant seeds for happiness. It also gets you out of your own rut.

3. Know that being a victim is an option.
You don't have to buy into the feeling of being a victim. You have a choice. Start one small action towards overcoming your situation. One small step.

4. See the challenge as an opportunity to overcome and be victorious.
Close your eyes and visualize yourself overcoming the obstacles. See how you will feel when your are standing, arms raised in victory. See how your life will be different, feel your strength.

5. Get support.
Sometimes a little support and guidance in seeing challenges as opportunities is needed. Research, ask friends, hire a coach.

Preparing and Planning

Last night I gave a talk to a group of high school baseball players on the benefits of mentally preparing for both practice and games. Mental preparation for sports is a great parallel to life. Just as in sports it's important to prepare mentally for your day.

Mental preparation includes imagery, positive self talk, relaxation or arousal techniques. In athletics, these ingredients prepare the athlete for performance in allowing them to rehearse how they want their performance to go, stay relaxed and prepare a strategy. Having the mind rehearse the performance builds inner confidence, positive thoughts and thus a better performance.

In life use this principal to prepare for your day. Take the time each morning to lay out your day. See yourself handling a busy day with calmness, stay positive and work your plan. Visualize yourself handling the unexpected things with calmness and clarity. While you can't predict what exactly will happen in a day, you do have choices about how you react.

Your thoughts are in your control. Your thoughts direct your focus, confidence and performance. Think positively, direct your focus, plan your day, then confidently perform your best.